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Saturday, December 18, 2010

:) Candy Gram

To: Marty

I just remembered the candy gram you sent me. Your was sweet and true.. You told me exactly how you felt. I on the other hand just said Happy Holidays... 
But little do you know, I have a hard time telling people what I have to say by writing it.
Im better with talking...But idk..here's my redo

You're funny, you're cute, your're sweet, you're nice, you're a dork <3, you're talented, you're amazing, but most of all you're yourself. Your true to yourself and others. And thats hard to find in a guy. So Im soo happy and lucky that I have you. Never in a million bagillion years would I have ever thought of dating you. But Im soo happy we are. You make me laugh, happy, smile, and feel so great inside. I love spending time with you and being with you. I LOVE having YOU in my life. :) This is how I feel only after a month of dating you, but Im looking forward for more months to come. I miss you already

- Marlee :P  

Ps: Merry Christmas

Saturday, December 4, 2010


Im the home wrecker, Im the problem, Im the reason why my grandma cries.
Im the theif, Im the mistake, Im the reason why my life is filled with lies.

I committed assault, I almost killed someone, I almost got into a fight.
I cut, I screamed, I hid, I ran. I packed my bags and escaped into the night.

I smile, I laugh, I dream, I fall.
I see the stars and try to count them all.

Im not used to being happy, I may act like it but Im not.
I like to feel sad and apathetic, but if I am I get caught.

My friends try to make me happy, but if they heard my story they would probably  stop.
Yet when Im  at the bottom they try to put me on the top.

I dont have the highest self-esteem, I dont always have a clue.
And this may all sound stupid, but boy if you only knew.

I fight, I stand, I live, I survive.
And for the first time in my life I've never felt so alive. 

I don't give a damn as to what people think.
For I dont have to answer questions if I smoke or if I drink.

I know what Ive done, and I know what Ive said.
But if life was about living with fear and regret aren't we better off dead?

Let us raise a glass to the misunderstood who came before us, for they chased after the sun.
And for the rest of us misunderstood children, are mission has just begun.

Friday, December 3, 2010

If today was your last day

I scream at the tops of my lungs hoping someone can hear me.
I pull out my hair and bang my head and wonder what life would be

With out me there would be no drama no problems no lies no pain
In the end I lose but you have something to gain.

Imagine I'm gone, I took my life and now it's in the grim reapers possession.
Im gone with no warning and there's no time for a reconciliation.

As you put your make up on you see a smudge on the mirror .
You wipe it clean so you can see clearer.

But what do you see, are you proud of what you've done?
Do you think about all the millions of people in the world or are you the only one?
If you were to leave the earth, could you say you had a good life?
Or did you live your life with regret and end it on bad strife?

Theres always something missing, and it kills to when you can't figure out what.
But to figure out what that is, you gotta walk through life with a strut. 

Sunday, November 28, 2010

Hell of a ride

The pain is so intense, the chills are unbearable, the withdrawal is scary.
The  feeling is strange, the emotions are changing, but it all feels good on the contrary. 

Like smoking weed it gets you high.
While your feet are on the floor your heads in the sky.

Like rolling the feeling cant be described, everything is amazing.
But the after affect is hell raising.

Like an emo girl cutting herself, you'd imagine it to hurt. But you dont understand.
The way she feels, she can only show by moving her hands.

Like sex, the hesitation, the pleasure, the feelings, the heat.
The movement of a bodies moving to one beat.

Like smiling everytime you see your lovers face.
Like listening to them breathe and you notice your at the same pace.

Whut the fuck am I talking about?

Saturday, November 20, 2010


Just hold my hand and hold me close. 
Just tell me that your mine and Im the one you want the most. 

Just kiss me gently and make it last.
For we never know what can happen and anything can happen fast.

Tell me what you feel and tell me all your secrets
We can stay up all night and talk while we lay under some blankets

Just hug me for awhile and lets just make each other smile.
Cause I'll go anywhere to feel this feeling I have when Im with you, I'll walk for miles.

We have so much time and theres so much to do
And we can do it all, as long as I am with you.

Thursday, November 11, 2010

Hello old friend

I havent seen this in a long time.
But cupid's commiting another crime.

He's stolen my heart again, who knows when I'll get it back.
He's taken it so many times that Ive stop keeping track.

Except his partner in crime, is of a gentler sort.
One who isnt a fake or douchebag in this sport.

He has a secret power, I think he has laser  x-ray vision.
Cause his eyes cut right through me, creating a large incision.

I dont wanna say this hurts me, in fact I cant feel a thing.
But what I can feel is his hand in mine, and something wierd is happening.

This crook has my heart, and I cant say I want it back.
Because I think I want him to have it, this is a proven fact.

His lips touched mine, and there was posion on his tongue.
I felt this exciting sensation that went spiraling through my lung.

They make a perfect team, causing mischief, hope, and dreams.
But Ive fallen for it badly, cause now nothing is what it seems. 

I think I like him, like alot more then I thought.
And now my stomach has butterflies, and my heart is in a knot.

Wednesday, November 10, 2010


My dad died when I was 3 years old.
This is the story that I was told.

He died in a car crash because of a drunk driver.
My dad didnt make, but the drunk driver was the survivor.

Why must the good die young? Why didn't I get the chance to meet him?
I want these answers to my questions, but instead my patience wears thin.

I want to remember the time he told me he loved me, I just want him to know.
I love him and I miss him, but how do I let this show.

I feel like crying when fathers day comes to town.
And I get pissed off when people say they hate their dad, when mines not even around.

Atleast you remember your dad,
be the memory good or bad.

Atleast youve seen his face.
I have no one real to fill his place.

I want to hold his hand, I want to look in his eyes.
"Dad I love you and miss you " as she falls to her knees and cries

If your dad left you when you were young, then this poem isnt meant for you
But if you were put in my situation. tell me what you would do.

There is so much more Id like to say, But I'll save it for a later day.

For the anniversary of my dad's death draws near, but until then I'll shed one tear.

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Sorry :/

I don't mean to hurt you, it just sort of happens
I can try to clean up my mess, by using your heart as a napkin.

I tried to make you smile, I tried to make you mine.
But at the same time you through my hard work in my face, and I ended up wasting my time.

The constant fighting and the constant doubt.
We went through all this and we aren't even going out.

I'm not gonna lie, the blame should be shared.
But I'm not gonna lie,  I do love you and that I've always cared.

I guess we should start over, or just move on and forget.
But we cant be together now, for I'm just not feeling it.

We weren't together long
But we both were always strong.
This poem could be our love song
That one day we could both sing along.

Monday, November 8, 2010

Sunday, November 7, 2010

EMOtional girl

She seems to be awake in the darkest part of night.
You hear her crying and dare to ask if she is alright.

You turn the light on and look at her face
her make up is running and shes stuck in a sad place

Slits on  her wrists, scars on her neck, bruises on her ribs.
She cries louder then a baby awake in their crib.
You can hear her pain and feel her skin.
She is tired of living in the world, her patience wears thin.

What could cause a girl to feel so much pain? Was it something someone said?
Shes tired of living. She wants to be dead.
Sick of trying, tired of crying. 
Yeah she's smiling but inside she's dying.

Dark clothing, dark music, dark emotions.
Up and down emotions that flow like the ocean. 

You want to hold her and tell her your there.
But she's heard it all before and she no longer cares.

Your scared of what will happen next, she's an amazing person inside
She's dying in a deep dark hell, where she only wants to be alive.

Until then she bleeds
Tired of what she sees
Take away the pain she pleads
as she falls onto her knees.

Thursday, November 4, 2010

You thought reading war and peace was hard. Try reading me

I'll send you a smile, I'll give you a wink.
But Im gonna make things challenging, Im gonna make you think.

We can hug, we can hold hands, we can even kiss.
But Im not letting you have me that easily, Your gonna have to be like this:

Your gonna text me, better yet even call.
Your gonna take me out to movies, your gonna take me to the mall.

Your gonna show me affection, I dont care what your frends thnk.
But if you think I'm kidding, I'll be gone in a blink.

Your gonna hold my hand and smile at my lame joke.
Your gonna think Im twice as cute when I burp or even choke. 

You cant win our fights, cause I will just walk away.
Cause baby this isnt burger king, you cant have it your way.
I can get a bit bitchy,  I wont reply to your text.
Your gonna have to wait til tomarrow where you'll have to wait and see what happens next. 

If I believe I was in the wrong, Ill grow a pair and say Im sorry
I'll drop it like a bad habit, It will be the end of that story.

Im self diagnosing myself bipolar but my zodiac sign is a Gemini
Im warning you I'll try to kill you, I'll be happy, and then want to cry.

Our relationship will get rocky, we may even brake up.
But the next day it will be better, and were ready to make up.

We are definitely gonna have fun, laugh, and smile all day.
Cause anytime we feel this together,It was always meant to be this way

Im new to the dating game, Im new to relationships.
But I only got one question, do you think you can handle this? ;)  

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

I wanna know what love is. I want you to show me

~Original Poem~

We're in high school and we tend not to know much.
But why do boys get erections just from the softest touch?

Why do you smile when your away from your boyfriend and laugh so hard you can barely stand.
And when your boyfriend's around you, you dont want to hold his hand.

Why are you sore, why wont you smile?
Why are you saying he loves you, when your clearly in denial.

I heard you've dated for months and you believe that shes the one for you.
But why are you acting so cocky when you made her do something she didnt want to?

Why are you in a relationship if you just flirt with other whores?
Why do you say you are sorry if you've done this all before?

I hope you know your 18 and I know you can get real wild.
But sweetie your girlfriend is 14, she's still basically a child.

Your beautiful, smart, skinny, your hardly known to be mean.
But why are you dressing like a slut and showing things that shouldn't be seen?

Your a heartbreaker, a whore, a nicer name a flirt.
But why would you say meaningful words if they're lies and someones gonna end up hurt?

Why did you slap her because she figured out you were lying?
I hope you know she slits her wrists and is in the corner crying?

Why did you have sex because you think your in love?
Why is she now pregnant where she she used to be a graceful dove?

For those couples who have never fight, who cheated, lied, or hurt.
I hope you know your persons special and you know how much they're worth.

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Wow...like seriously?

~Original poem~

Your a senior, your on the football team, I guess your considered cool.
But how dumb do you think I am to let you make me look like a fool.

I know how your mind thinks and I know what your up to.
But I refused to be like others girls and sext is just not what I do. 

You text me and ask "wats up" and I could ask you the same.
But when I tell you how I'm feeling, you think its just a silly game.

It's weird cause I used to like you, I wish we could go back to last year.
We used to be so close, and now I can't stand to be near.

I guess if you said you were sorry,  I guess could just let this go.
But it turns out your just a loser and that this is something you should know. 

Don't text me after practice. Don't call me when your about to sleep.
Cause I won't send you a reply. I won't even say a peep.

I can't tell you who this is about, cause this guy attends my school.
But I hope that if this happens to you, you know the guy is just a tool.

Monday, November 1, 2010

So theres these guys

~This is an original poem~

While I still have your sweater, you still have my heart.
When you give me a hug, just know I never want us apart.

When you text me and call , I stand far back and try to read your signs
You ask me what im thinking,  your always on my mind.

I want to tell you I love you cause this is how I feel
I know you have a hard time believing, but let me tell you this is real.

I see you from afar but I want you to be close
I want to tell you I need you cause your the one I want the most

 We just started to talk, and got to know each other more.
But when we talk in person, my heart just hits the floor.

But I'll sit back and take it slow, I dont want us to rush.
I just hope that after you read this, you know that I'm your crush.

~This is my first blog post...I hope it was ok
But this is the begining of my story, for now its all I have to say~